


Crawl Out

by TheDeadAreWalking



Series: Fictober18 [19]
Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, Mortality
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-11
Updated: 2019-02-11
Packaged: 2019-10-26 10:08:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17743898
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheDeadAreWalking/pseuds/TheDeadAreWalking
Summary: Nate can't do anything as he watched Hancock dive into the radioactive pool.-Day 19 - "Oh please like this is the worst I've done."





	Crawl Out

**Author's Note:**

> You think im done? you fools ill do all 31 days if it takes me until next october. cowards

Seeing Hancock dive into the carter of radioactive water nearly gave him a heart attack. They'd been standing on the edge discussing their next move when Hancock sighed and tossed a few paper items his way and jumped in before he could get a word out.

Nate could do nothing but stand and watch as his partner disappeared under the glowing water. A glance at his pip-boy confirmed again that he couldn't go in the water, no radiation suit or amount of rad-x would help him this time so he stood and waited.

And waited.

And waited.

They'd been looking for a jewel, worthless really but the railroad was putting together some weapon that needed gems for power and the ruby they were after just so happened to be smack dab at the bottom of the most toxic pit in the wasteland. Realistically, Nate knew Hancock would be fine if radiation was all that waited for him in the water but as he watched the water ripple occasionally he knows Hancock isn't alone in the deadly mud puddle.

Two minutes passed and Nate pulled out a bottle of rad-x. If he downed the whole bottle, combined with his radiation suit, maybe he could get in and out before too much of his skin started to burn off. At this point, he didn't really care because the thought of Hancock down there needing him was too much.

Just as he open the pill bottle the ghoul's head popped out near the edge of the crater, "Lookie what I got," Nate closed the bottle and let out puff of air he didn't know he was holding and watched it fog up the plastic window of his radiation suit, "Am I that good looking you're steaming the joint up?"

Nate laughed and blindly waved his hand where he thought Hancock was to help him up. A wet hand closed over his and he yanked the ghoul up. Only once Hancock was safe and back on dry land did he let some anger seep in, "What the fuck were you think? Just jumping in like that. Christ, John."

Hancock raised his hands in mock surrender, "Oh please, like this is the worst I've done."

Nate looked at him and then looked away and then back again before throwing his hands in the air and stomping away. Hancock wordlessly followed, "You! You're so! I just!" Hancock tilted his head and waited for Nate to chew him out more but Nate just continued stomping away from the radiation and towards the small safe house they'd found the other night on their way to the crater, "I hate when you do shit like that."

The mayor shrugged, "I know you do. Sometimes I just do things before I think."

"I know you do," the vault dweller echoed back. They continued in tense silence to the safe house.

-

"Is it selfish to think about my own death?" Nate mumbled as he stared up at the stars through a hole in the ceiling.

Hancock rolled over to face him, "I think it's morbid."

"Let me rephrase," Nate sighed and looked at the ghoul, "is it selfish to think about how death will affect others?"

Hancock's eyes shown through the darkness of the room, "What others, Nate?"

"Deacon, Nick," Nate looked away, "you."

"What," Hancock struggled for a moment, "What are you asking?"

"You jumped into the radiation today like it was nothing like you didn't even notice it. If I had taken my suit off for a moment I wouldn't even be here. I'd be on the ground puking up my own blood and you'd have to get me to Diamond City or I'd die."

Hancock chuckles nervously, "Good thing I'm here."

"You don't get it. One day you might not be and I might not notice and then I'll die. I'll die alone in my own blood, puke and cold and some rat chewing on my corpse. I'll die like everyone else and you'll be fine. You'll," Nate wiped at the tears falling down his face, "go back to Goodneighbor and be fine." Nate sat up and rubbed his face. He looked at his pipboy and saw that even now, a good few miles from the radioactive crater, he was still picking up rads. "Back before all this immortality was a fairytale and now I know so many people that can outlive me and any other human by lifetimes. I'm just a speck of dust in all of your lives. This world is going to kill me and I'm so scared."

He thinks for a moment Hancock somehow fell asleep on him but he feels arms curl around him and hold tight, "You don't think I'm scared of you leaving me?" Nate didn't say anything. What could he say? This whole conversation felt pitiful and self-indulgent, "I worry every time we go out that something will happen to you and I'll have to face the rest of my days alone. I don't want to do this without you anymore. I'm not even sure I could." 

Nate laughed nervously and wiped the last of his tears away, "We really are a match, aren't we?"

He can feel Hancock shake around him. He's not sure if he's laughing or crying, "Who knows you might end up a ghoul."

"Ugh and look like one of those ugly bastards," he received a pinch for that and smiled, "You know I'm joking. I find you extremely attractive, John. It's just something I think about and today reminded me of it more than other days."

"It's okay. We'll just take this world as it comes to us. One day at a time, together."

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave a comment!


End file.
